"Me Time"

Something happened this weekend that hasn't happend in 14+ months: I was alone in my house, for almost 24 hours!

Austin had an overnight Veritas event and my parents took Adelyn for the night. I was alone. It was incredibly quiet and I realized this was the first time this has happened, well, since Adelyn was born. Friday night I had a great night of eating, drinking wine, and hanging out with the Crossing staff. It was pretty nice to not have to worry about a babysitter or how long I was going to stay. I came home to my dark empty house, stayed up too late working on a sewing project, and woke up on my own.

I'm not the type of person who lays on the couch when I have alone time. I used every minute to do things I wouldn't normally do with a husband and baby around. I was out the door on Saturday morning by 7 a.m. to hit up some garage sales! After that I went to the farmers market only to be followed by an hour long bike ride on the MKT Trail. It was perfect weather to be outside and I was loving every minute. After getting back from my ride, I did some yard work, watered plants all around our house, did laundry, grabbed lunch, and then took an a long nap.

Even though there was tons of stuff I would have liked to have done, at that point, I was ready for my family to come home. The quietness was strange and the feeling of being entirely on my own time was foreign.

I had forgotten what it felt like to be on my own schedule. Getting a taste of it was refreshing but also showed me how easily I can be selfish with my time. Somewhere in the past 14 months, God has shaped me in a major way to enjoy serving my family and to not see my time as a mom as a sacrifice. This job is my life now and I have grown to a point of not resenting the fact that I don't get to do exactly what I'd like to do every day.

I truly enjoyed my "me time" but I also realized that the independent woman I saw this weekend was no longer "me."

No one can prepare you on how much being a mom will re-shape your identity. It happens so gradually and slowly that it's almost unrecognizable. I'm thankful that God gave me a glimpse of how much he has used Adelyn to shape me and mold me into the woman and mom he wants me to be.